soda addiction
There is some good conversation going on over here at Snack Girl (who I follow by the way).
Why Quitting Diet Coke Is A Good Idea & Some Suggestions For How To Do It
7:00 AM | Labels: battle, diet, discouragement, encouragement, goals, water | 0 Comments
sugar binge
I binged on sugar this weekend.
I am sad.
Thinking about why...
- My husband purchased and brought this
into the house. This is a man who just never buys sugar cereal! So I'm perplexed at his motives. Perhaps he was trying to be nice to the kids. Well, I am a recovering Cereal-Aholic. So, I had 4 bowls in 2 days and they were wonderful and crunchy and nutty and I enjoyed every last bite.
But then I didn't feel great and my tongue was sore and I now only wanted sugar.
You know how Dexter talks about his dark passenger? Sugar is my dark passenger. She must be controlled. - I have not planned for success. I need to have good, satisfying food in the house and I have not done this. I live in the moment (part of my blue/yellow personality). This must change! I'm not sure why this particular step is so difficult for me.
- It was very (very) hot out so I really didn't want to go anywhere.
7:00 PM | Labels: diet, discouragement, failure, not giving up, sugar | 0 Comments
I never thought I’d do this
- I had headaches every single day.
- I was on 2 asthma medications that were giving me bad side effects. (Including a 25lb weight gain and thrush. If you don’t know what thrush is; count yourself fortunate.)
- I have no actual energy but I am hyper all the time.
- I can’t focus.
- I’m fat. I was OK with this for a long time, but my weight hit a point where I was now physically uncomfortable. Sitting in a restaurant, just being… I was aware of the weight and I was uncomfortable. So that got my attention.
- Ultimately, this systemic candida outbreak was the clincher for me. As I read about it, I am overwhelmed by the information and the steps necessary to kill this tiny replicating demon. It is subversive and evil. However, the symptoms are bad enough that I was finally willing to make some of the bigger changes.
7:00 PM | Labels: battle, evil, new beginnings, not giving up, success, sugar, symptoms, update, weight | 0 Comments
a little progress
Why is it that progress makes me lazy!??
As soon as I lose some weight or get some good results, my first thought is, "Sigh, well now I can splurge a little because I accomplished something!"
I realize this is part of the problem that got me here; to my unhealthy and overweight self. I need to learn a new way of "celebration" that feels like a reward! A friend of mine was cute; I weighed in on Tuesday and lost 3.7 lbs -- insert image of me jumping up and down (you'll have to use your imagination though because you'll not see that as a gif!). She wanted to reward my hard work, but didn't want to sabotage my progress, so she gave me...
7:00 AM | Labels: battle, encouragement, good vs. best, not giving up, weight loss | 3 Comments
checking in on my journey
To date, I've still not lost much weight.
However, I have made some good changes.
I stopped drinking soda -- which I really though I would hold on to much longer than I did.
I went to iced tea for a while and while that was less sugar, I was still adding sugar.
I had a few ice blended Mocha's from Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf and was pleased to learn they were too sweet for me and I requested less powder. Would never have considered that as a possibility for me before.
I have to be very careful to maintain where I am. I cannot let myself look too far down the path to all that I should or may accomplish with this. (ie: going sugar and carb free) because ultimately, I don't really want to do that. I want to be healthy, but I already feel like I don't have so much to eat and I worry that a turkey sandwich (with or without bread) every day is going to get old. Then what will I do?
I am trying to stick with what is right in front of me.
Less sugar going for no sugar.
More exercise (almost anything will count at this point.)
I did notice that I am having a few fantasies about being really healthy and fit and feeling better and having a nice body. There is some fear involved, but I want to be more than what I am. (or less of what I am?)
Looking forward to where I end up.
Couldn't do it without the help I'm getting.
Seriously, Enspirit Wellness in Lake Forest (hi Kaci!) have made such a positive and encouraging impact on my journey. I'm sure there is much I wouldn't have even considered without them. I am so grateful my insurance includes their services!
I am
i want sugar!
10:34 PM | | 0 Comments
failure
I'm getting frustrated because I don't seem to be able to commit to a new lifestyle.
I've made some progress. Things I never really thought I could change and I'm trying really hard to hold on to that! (very little dairy, no soda, less sugar, better snacks...at least most of the time) I give myself a round of applause for that.
I keep seeing people post online about their new distributor status where they're selling some health product (I notice a lot of protein shakes!) and they've either helped someone loose weight and here's a picture of how great they look (before and after pics of course) or how they just lost 5 lbs or 8 lbs and how they love eating healthy and how this snack of a handful of blueberries is so yummy. (I'm sorry, but still, a handful of blueberries is NOT satisfying to me.)
I had to stop following those links because it's depressing me. I don't know if I'm failing or if my journey is just that different. I kind of already know it's both. Not completely on the failure part, I have made some progress; just not enough. I'm just not motivated enough.
So this is the part where God might give me a little shove in the right direction because I've prayed for Him to help me be motivated. And that shove might be some kind of medical issue that basically requires I exercise -- shudder.
I just know exercise is the answer and yet I don't want to do it. I find it boring and I just plain don't want to do it! Yes, I know how juvenile that sounds and realize that at some point I am going to have to lift my lovely yet large derriere off the chair and go move it around. I wish there was some breakthrough I could have (other than perhaps a large 2x4 hitting me to get my attention) that would put me in the right frame of mind for such activity.
I guess I keep on trying.
11:47 PM | Labels: battle, exercise, goals, lies | 1 Comments
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