I have fallen off the wagon.  (Kaci, don't read this!)

I'm not siting in the dust watching it roll away, but I started walking next to it.

Perhaps it's the stress of the past two weeks -- unfortunately much of it self inflicted.  I won't go into it other than to say work has been way stressful; I've not been sleeping enough; I'm allowing myself to push the tiredness to pretty bad levels; I've missed my vitamin infusions (and boy can I tell the difference without them); my husband and son were gone for 1.5 weeks (that was peaceful and stressful) and we are moving at work.

I forgot to bring my supplements one morning and had to let it go.  I forgot that night.  I remembered the next morning and took them, but didn't take the afternoon set.  And thus it's gone for the past week.

I can feel the difference.  Which ultimately I suppose is good.  Now I need to kick it up a notch and get back on that wagon.

I want to succeed at this.  I want to eat better.  I guess the emotional overwhelmingness (so not a word) has really gotten to me.

I feel like I can't do anything to make a difference.  Not in my own life but in the world.  How to say this so it doesn't sound like it's about me....

I watched Food Inc. a while back and it rocked my world.  The evil that is a part of some of the companies that control our food and how it is raised and killed is horrifying.  I don't want to be a party to it.  It's exhausting to make these changes though.  It requires a lot more food shopping and a lot more meal planning to make it work.  This is not how I have ever lived my life.  I'm realizing, and I may have said this before, that I was quite happy with the processed-ness of my food.  In Food Inc. they talk about the value/importance of knowing where you food comes from.  I think I liked not knowing.  

Well, back on the wagon for me!


Mrs. Brewer said...

I knew you were having a difficult time these last few weeks. You should have let me know. I'm a great cheerleader, listener, brow beater, you know.. friend. If I make a basket with my hands to boost you up I can do that, or toss you over the fence. Which ever works. You can always talk to me. I'll listen. ~The Goddess

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