Kicking & Screaming My Way to Health: evil

Showing posts with label evil. Show all posts

I never thought I’d do this

I never thought I’d do this.

I have to say… I was not this person.

When I heard people say, “Oh Equal is poison, you really shouldn’t use it!” I thought, “Yeah, whatever! If there is a problem with this stuff it will happen to me because I use so much of it.” And went haughtily on my merry way. Because honestly, if I listen to everything everyone says I would live in a bubble on air. The one issue with the internet is that there is so much information and much of it is contradictory. We need to learn to find information that resonates as true and be willing to vet the sources to confirm our facts. Remember the old warning “Anything that sounds too good to be true probably is.” (try teaching that to kids who start using the internet and are viewing these clever marketing ads tempting them to give information to win a non-existent prize.

I am going off on a tangent there.

I was saying that I’m not this person. I was the “I will eat what I want, when I want and as much as I want person. “ I didn’t ration myself or try to limit food. I tried to eat protein with sugar so I didn’t get a headache, but still.

I don’t exercise, I eat what I want, I have poor sleep habits.

It does catch up with you.

Perhaps pain and discomfort are the only thing some of us will listen to. I joke that God often needs a 2x4 to get my attention. Not because He needs to yell at me but because I force Him to that point. I keep pushing back and God cares enough to ride it out with me. (Thank you God!)

So… why am I changing?

I had headaches every single day.
I was on 2 asthma medications that were giving me bad side effects. (Including a 25lb weight gain and thrush. If you don’t know what thrush is; count yourself fortunate.)
I have no actual energy but I am hyper all the time.
I can’t focus.
I’m fat. I was OK with this for a long time, but my weight hit a point where I was now physically uncomfortable. Sitting in a restaurant, just being… I was aware of the weight and I was uncomfortable. So that got my attention.
Ultimately, this systemic candida outbreak was the clincher for me. As I read about it, I am overwhelmed by the information and the steps necessary to kill this tiny replicating demon. It is subversive and evil. However, the symptoms are bad enough that I was finally willing to make some of the bigger changes.

SUGAR

I’ve talked about what I’m giving up. Some of the changes I’ve made.

· Less sugar, lowering the amount in my coffee.

· Drinking more water.

· Going on supplements.

· Stopping soda.

· No longer drinking sugary drinks.

· No dessert and candy.

My life that sounds miserable when I look back.

I don’t feel miserable though! I feel excited.

I’ve made these changes slowly over a year. Taking on one thing at a time (sometimes several things, but I find that leads to failure pretty quickly). It’s been a one step forward, half a step back, 2 steps forward, 2 steps back… and so on. But at the end of this past year, I’m in a better place than I was and I’m only counting the progress.

deep fried EVIL's brother

IM from today....

me: I think my mantra this week should be NO COOKIES

K: that's doable
K: remember: attainable goals

me: I'm not even hungry but those crack cookies are down there SINGING TO ME
me: wooing me
me: calling me
me: they have to be one of the best cookies ever

K: My sis likes the deep fried cakes of EVIL

me: that's what they are, deep fried cakes of EVIL

K: think of the cookies as the EVIL brother to the donuts
K: only baked

me: I used to not ever have them (deep fried cakes of EVIL), then slowly started partaking them again

K: not too big on the EVIL death cakes

me: same with french fries
me: though I find those easier to have just a few and stop

K: and they are soooo tasty
K: EVIL deep fried potato sticks

me: I'd honestly rather have "sweet potato's" (quotes because they are really yams. Yams = orange, sweet potato's = white, slightly yellow)

K: silly

me: COOKIES SHUT UP!!!!

...later...

K: are you working late tonight?

me: what cookies?
me: honest, I walked by and they JUMPED into my mouth
me: chased me even
me: Horror Movie Cookies

K: you are a baaaad girl
K: just remember, everyone usually dies in horror movies.

stupid deep fried EVIL's baked brother

evil

So, this journey I'm on is both physical and spiritual...and mental.
I realize that I am in fact, quite rebellious. I sabbotage myself in thinking and give way to eating whatever I want. Especially during these past few weeks where I've been feeling so powerless because of all the evil I'm seeing in the world. I finally realized (thanks to Mom) part of my problem.

I've been believing a lie.

I have always loved the quote:
"All it takes for evil to exist is for good men to do nothing."

It's not actually true. At least not completely.

The lie is that we evil won't exist; but it will. Evil will always exist this side of heaven. Actually, I could probably say evil will always exist because hell is for eternity.

That kind of takes the pressure off, at least for me.

Do we have to stand up against evil? Yes. In our daily life and wherever we come in contact with it. We must fight or evil will take over.

I am looking at what evil I need to fight. I still get overwhelmed by the volume of causes and I don't want to spend so much time looking out that my own family is neglected in the name of fighting evil. That falls into the letting good get in the way of best. I want the best!